Great Minds Do Think Alike; and F*ck!ng Should Always Be at the Top of the List
“”You’re like total renaissance guy,” I say. We’re in the lounge of Vancouver’s stately Hotel Sylvia. The light is subdued, the atmosphere quiet and elegant. “You make movies, you create books, you paint. Any other creative things you do?”
And he looks at me — wide set blue eyes in a youthful and somehow oddly innocent face and says, “Fuck.”
From the source, then: Clive Barker fucks creatively.”
From the interview done by Linda Richards for January Magazine
The first known occurrence of the obsenity fuck appearing in print, is in a poem composed sometime before 1500 which satirizes the Carmelite friars of Cambridge, England. Written in a mixture of Latin and English the line reads: “Non sunt in coeli, quia gxddbov xxkxzt pg ifmk.” Thus the translation reads: “They are not in heaven because they fuck wives of Ely (Dictionary.com–fuck–Word History). How utterly syncretic then Barker’s answer given his mastership of raising Hell and its inhabitants.
More to it, the syncrocity that just this afternoon Gilding was recounting a particulalry favorite youthful stunt she pulled in writing an essay on the very same obsenity to teach her rather pompously zealous Professor for continuously slandering her sentence structures as ‘awkward’. The postulating ass may have been well aquainted with the word’s definitions 1-4, but Gilding made certain he understood definitions 6 & 7 on a far more personal level.
Walking Through the Graveyard or Folding Penis Greeting Cards
“…blur the line between rock, theater, and performance art…witty stories of misfits, outcasts and other human oddities in sound bites of delirious, decadent musical theater. Throw in a couple of songs about walking through graveyards or folding giant penis greeting cards…the makings of a very visual, very intense, and very witty musical concoction.”
~Kris Allen, Coast Magazine
Movie set to release in 2008
Cast: Sarah Brightman, Paul Sorvino, Billy Moseley, Paris Hilton, Alexa Vega, Anthony Head, and Darren Bousman
Link: Repo: The Genetic Opera
The Gates of Hell
“The finale was worth waiting for; twenty-two dancers gathering for The Gates of Hell, a scene that had more than a passing resemblance to an orgy…With its mirror-like Mylar backing…this fifty-foot A-fram scaffold…covered in a mass of bodies which slowly fall from it, wrestling and dancing beneath it in small and large groups. Finally they slowly climb it again, returning to their precarious perches as the final curtain falls.”
Review by David Mead on the Pennsylvania Ballet’s performance of Margo Sappington’s 1974 work, Rodin, Mis en Vie.
Link: ballet.magazine
Not Even Death Can Defy a Ravishing Sense of Humor
The brilliant Nicholas notified Gilding of this new Staircase marvel.
This post appeared today on Wit of the Staircase, blog of the late illustrious intellectual…(like how Gilding used two adjectives for the same word but without repeating its meaning ..::juggles eyebrows suggestively::..)…Theresa Duncan
~ The word was ‘brilliant’, by the way. Gilding’s word of the day. ~
According to the Editor’s Note addenda at the bottom of the post, Ms. Duncan had left this post to appear automatically on this date. The post goes as follows:
Monday, October 29, 2007
Basil Rathbone’s GhostsBasil Rathbone was entertaining a friend one night at his home in the Hollywood Hills. Both men were keenly interested in dogs and their breeding. His friend had brought with him two handsome specimens. As it got late, the two friends had a parting drink and called it a night. The friend and the canines got into the car and drove away. But, sadly, not very far.
As Rathbone turned to go back inside, he heard the screech of brakes and the sickening sounds of a ghastly car crash. His friend and the dogs were killed instantly.
In deep shock, and with the thought, “He was just standing here,” pounding in his aching head, Rathbone heard the damned phone begin ringing. Mechanically he picked it up and heard the voice of the MGM studio’s night switchboard operator. “Sorry, Mr. Rathbone but I have a woman on the line who simply must talk to you. She says it’s desperately, desperately important.” Probably some smitten fan, he thought as the operator said, “Sir, I’ve never heard anyone be so urgent. She hopes you’ll know what a certain message means.”
Rathbone, impatient and in a daze, snapped, “For Christ’s sake, put her on and be done with it!” The woman was calling from her home, located way to hell and gone on the far side of Los Angeles. She had a low and cultivated speaking voice and identified herself as a trance medium and clairvoyant. At that time the movie colony was going through one of its periodic infatuations with psychics, astrologers, table-tipping séances, Ouija boards and such. Rathbone scorned all such claptrap, but, he said, “the woman’s voice was so compelling.”
“I have for you, sir, what we term ‘a calling of urgency,’” she said. “It came to me with such impact that, although not knowing its meaning, I simply had to find you. The message is brief. Here it is in its entirety: ‘Traveling very fast. No time to say good-bye.’ And then, ‘There are no dogs here.’ ”
The next time I saw Rathbone (F.Y.I., he lived at 135 Central Park West), more years had gone by, and he was in the act of receiving a summons for letting his dog Ginger off the leash in Central Park. I thought he might have decided, looking back, that it had all been some sort of bizarre coincidence, or maybe a highly original prank. He said, “At the time, of course, I was quite shaken by it.” And now? “I am still shaken by it.”
So, Nicholas, you posed the quandary of not knowing what to make of this. Well, as for Gilding’s thoughts on this, it is yet another eximplification of Wit’s ravishing sense of humor.
Link: Basil Rathbone’s Ghost–Wit of the Staircase
Original Article Wit referenced from: Dick Cavett–New York Times Blog
Via: Nicholas
Le Breaudeo Came to Town
The Gilded Duo attended a brilliant lecture and demonstration by Beau Raymond, a Ceramics artist. Born and raised in Louisiana and bred from a strongly cultural Creole family, Raymond professes to be a product of his environment and fed on the milk of B-rate horror flicks. Currently, Raymond is a producing artist and an MFA Candidate at the University of Florida.
His earlier works (and Gilding’s particular favorites) are based on The Divine Comedy written by Dante Alighieri. Allowing him to explore his darker side while walking on the dark side, each piece of this body of work is a representation of Dante’s nine levels of hell.
Come kiddies, you know the sins: Limbo; lust; gluttony; Heretics; The Seventh Circle, where those who committed violence against others, those who committed suicide, and those who committed violence against God (the blasphemers), violence against nature (the sodomites), and–a particular favorite–those who committed violence against art (the userers) suffered the fiery desert; followed by those of the Eighth Ring of Hell: the Fraudulent (the panderers and seducers, flatterers, simony, sorcerers, corrupt politicias (like how those last three go together!), Hypocrites, Thieves, Fraudulent Advisors (note: the fraudulent advisors are further down the chain of worse sins committed than the Politicians. Goes to show you its the ones who pull the strings behind the suits that are the threat.), the sowers of discord, and those who are inflicted with disease in this Eighth Ring of Hell, the various assortment of falsifiers; and the worst sinner upon all sinners…The Traitors. Oooo…and this level of Hell has a special way of remembering it–for those of us who think to commit that particular crime. The Rings of the Ninth Level are named after their particular inhabitant–Caina, Antenor, Ptolomaea, and Judecca.
Now back to the presentation…
Raymond’s works have evolved since this traipse through the levels of hell, though it has not totally left it. His current works focus on the system of ethical beliefs that reflect morality. The works he creates is the result of a lack of morality or ethics. This leads to the grotesqueness his artworks physically embody, which he refers to as, “post-human behavior.”
The Perennial Portrait
Particularly fascinated by the perennial gardens in his region–some controlled while others spontaneous–Eric Montoya translated the layers of composition of the perennials into a series of abstract images that deliver the full impact of portraiture.
“Perennial flowers offer the viewer an opportunity to reflect on the many entendres within each piece. Flowers offer a depth of symbolism associated with their image from the Victorian age. The calla lily holds an association to the funeral; the dahlia is a symbol of death, the rose a symbol of passion. Thus, the subject adds to the overall meaning of each portrait. The portraiture represents an ideal of beauty.”
Eric Montoya
Link: Brad Cooper Gallery
Young Woman Strangles T-Mobile Associate While Staving Off Police with Roundhouse Kicks
Gilding has decided that there are far more reasons to hate the cell phone that has made itself necessary in her life. As if the opportunity for people to be in contact with her at all hours of the day weren’t annoying enough as it is–you know, it matters not how the many times Gilding has informed members of her family what hours of the day she will be in class with her students and not to call, it appears as if no other time is ever acceptable to call her except those times. And don’t dare turn that phone off. Heads will roll if Gilding and Mr. Gilding do that because, as is argued by all and of all ages, what is the purpose of having the phone if we never leave it on! Oh, who knows, maybe for EMERGENCY PURPOSES or all those other hours of the day that Gilding is not in class. But that irritation is neither here nor there any longer, for if you can’t change the person you certainly can’t change three sides of family members, so the Gilded Duo have moved beyond it.
However, it is absolutely intolerable that her cellular service provider mess up the records of her billing payments–not once but four months in a row. It is simply not OK to continue to temporarily interrupt her service for late payment when she is staring at the bank statement showing that the cellular provider has in fact received payment!
So, Gilding is going to her local cellular service provider store location to give them serious Hell with bank statements, incorrect billing statements sent, and confirmation numbers in hand waving furiously. So my Gilded Children, keep your eyes peeled to your favorite news channel for you just may see Gilding on the news. Dreams of the broadcast have been dancing in Gilding’s head:
______________________________________________
“A young woman strangles a T-Mobile associate while staving off police with roundhouse kicks till the company’s Home Office of Operations agreed, with a written guarentee from the CEO, Robert Dotson, to never fuck up her billing and payment records and/or service again. The T-Mobile corporation also offered the disgruntled customer two years of free service–the length of one service agreement contract–for the safe return of their T-Mobile associate–minus a few limbs. But the associates limbs were a small price to pay to prevent the mad woman from blowing up the store. Which would have resulted in several hundreds of thousands of dollars lost in damages to the store and merchandise, unrefundable by the product’s manufacturers.
The T-Mobile associate has recieved a fifty cent increase and employee of the month, complete with a placard with his picture on it to be displayed in his T-Mobile store.”
Let’s dehydrate 5 million people to death so our theme park can have 1.2million gallons of manufactured snow: That’s brilliant!
“For more than five months, the lake that provides drinking water to almost five million people here [Georgia] has been draining away in a withering drought. Sandy beaches have expanded into flats of orange mud. Tree stumps not seen in half a century have resurfaced. Scientists have warned of impending disaster.
And life, for the most part, has gone on just as before.
All summer, more than a year after the drought began, fountains sprayed and football fields were watered, prisoners got two showers a day and Coca-Cola’s bottling plants chugged along at full strength. On an 81-degree day this month, an outdoor theme park began to manufacture what was intended to be a 1.2-million-gallon mountain of snow.”
What part of year-long drought aren’t they getting?!? Well, I guess that would be everything! The snow…now that’s the kicker. And wait, I love this next statement by Gov. Sonny Perdue’s director of environmental protection.
“We are not here because we consumed our way into this drought, as some would suggest.”
Reeaaallly…then explain this statement:
““We have made it clear to the planners and executive management of this state for years that we may very well be on the verge of a systemwide emergency,” said Mark Crisp, a water expert in the Atlanta office of the engineering firm C. H. Guernsey.”
But instead…
“Georgia has engaged in interminable squabbles with neighboring states over dam releases and flow rates. The latest effort at mediation with Alabama fell apart just last month. And Georgia officials insist that Atlanta would have plenty of water were it not for the Army Corps of Engineers, which they say has released more water from its main source of water, Lake Lanier, than is necessary to protect three endangered species downstream.”
Not saying that Gilding agrees–because she doesn’t–but even if the release of water to protect three endangered species downstream–which since Gilding lives “downstream” she can tell you is not only a fish that is used as a staple food source by a majority of inhabitants in the South, it is essential to the maintenance of the eco-system to promote the proper birth and migration of other species as well as prevent waterways from being clogged by overgrowth of plant life. Remember folks, we’re the intruders on the eco-system, not the other way around–could have been a contributing factor to the drought that’s about the dehydrate the population of Atlanta, the whole “outdoor theme park beginning to manufacture what was intended to be a 1.2-million-gallon mountain of snow” is most definitely a contributing factor that should have been eliminated, not argued for when placed in competition with SAVING THE ECO-SYSTEM!
“Those making that argument against Georgia include many people in Florida, the only state in the region to have adopted a water plan and home to the downstream end of the basin that includes Lake Lanier. An editorial Friday in the St. Petersburg Times said that the blame lay not with the corps but with “a record drought, unrestrained population growth and poor water-conservation habits.”
Although Gilding does have to say that while sympathizing with the repetitive argument given by individuals and organizations, such as Pat Stevens of the Atlanta Regional Commission, that issuing a state-of-emergency water conservation plan “will close businesses…You can’t just do this overnight…,” it can’t help but be countered with the fact that this drought has been in full swing for over a year and that such engineering firms as C. H. Guernsey had warned for years that a systemwide emergency was well on the verge of occuring. Enacting a proper plan for water conservation years ago could have with great likelyhood prevented this from happening. We reap what we sew.
However, Gilding will concede this:
“Georgia is not at the back of the pack. Alabama, where severe drought is even more widespread, is even further behind in its planning.”
Continue…
Link: “New to Being Dry, the South Struggles to Adapt”–NYTimes
Tee Hee…like the font play?
Okay, it’s 1 o’clock in the morning.
Give me a break.
I’ll have the two Amigos with a side order of these…
Chipiola Spiral Paperclips
These spiral paperclips add a bit of style to your desktop. One hundred twenty five paper clips packaged in a reusable tin container. Made of zinc. Price: $9.50.
Desk Dots
Desk Dots are a versatile and fun desk accessory that can be used as an organizer, picture holder, desk sculpture, business card holder, and even a stress reliever. These super powerful ceramic magnets easily hold papers in place. Pair off the dots to make an elegant picture holder or place them in a circle to create a round organizer. Set of six. Price: $22.00.
Clote Velcro Key Holder
The Clote is an ideal solution for keeping keys in a single, easy access location. This steel wall-mounted unit features five color-coordinated Velcro circles and loop fastener key chains. Clote is assembled in a workshop for physically challenged people in Germany. Featured in the “Destination: Berlin” collection, this piece is part of a limited-time product collection celebrating the city’s young and dynamic design scene.
Photoclips
Karl Emilio Pircher’s Photoclips introduces new dimensions to photography. Every bag contains clear 2D and orange 3D Photoclips for creating unlimited constructions from photographs, including hanging photo curtains, free-standing picture castles, and mounted photo mosaics. Recommended for ages 4 and up. Price: $10.00.
Link: Desk Accessories–MoMA
A Leather-clad Amigo that Won’t Steal Your Boyfriend
From the MoMA’s “Destination: Buenos Aires” collection, these Amigo Leather Desk Accessories represent the vibrant design scene of Argentina. “Kangaroo” and “Piggy” along with other selected products from emerging Argentinean designers are MoMA-exclusive in the United States and will be available for a limited time only. Developed in collaboration with MALBA, this collection continues the MALBA’s mission to collect, conserve, study and disseminate Latin American art, dating from the early twentieth century to present.
Handcrafted from fine leather, “Kangaroo” is the perfect message center, holding papers and pencils–even a cell phone–in its pocket and messages in its mouth. “Piggy” is an ideal coin bank for all ages and is easily emptied by releasing a flap below the tail–how appropriate! Price? A mere $45.00 for “Piggy” and $38.00 for “Kangaroo”.
Hello Kitty Fabulousness: Who needs to turn 50 to be golden
Simply can’t live without celebrating Hello Kitty’s 33rd Birthday, then let the gold spangled Kitty hotness begin.
Beautiful and lovely, the Pure Gold Hello Kitty Trump has a golden luster worthy of the school of gem. Made of pure gold and depicting the cuteness of Hello Kitty, this regulation bridge set of playing cards comes pacaked in a plush, red velvet lined, Paulownia wood box. Price: $567,000 Yen.
Dazzling Gold illuminates the world of Versailles vividly depicting Kitty.
This Hello Kitty Gold Fine Art comes specially framed. Price: $330,000 Yen
Own Hello Kitty’s Pure Gold Business Card complete with Hello Kitty’s name, vitals, and special commemoration of her 33rd anniversary. The business card comes packaged in a cushiony Paulownia wood box and a special CD to add to your collection of music as well. Price: $10,500 Yen.
Simply having Hello Kitty’s Business card not enough for you. Simply must have your name imprinted right next to the Golden Kitty’s. Then choose one of the four designs available and have your name, address, and phone or fax number appear as golden and glossy as the Celebrated Kitty herself. Price: a mere $12,600 Yen.
Link: Hello Kitty 33rd Anniversary–Sanrio
Via: popgadget
This ancient tree, Grandmother…
“This ancient tree, which I’ve since taken to calling Grandmother…I felt, beyond rational explanation…I was connected to her. Grandmother inspired me to bring people to her, to photograph them playing in her huge branches, dwarfed by them as if they were children.
And so began The TreeSpirit Project.
In and around trees, people feel they are a part of something bigger…The photographs sometimes seem to be an excuse to simply play or have an adventure in nature. Some people spontaneously climb or dance or swing in a tree…that the experiences we have making the photographs are as important, perhaps more important, than the photographs themselves.
…humans and trees have been interdependent for thousands of years and still are…we have the power to destroy other life forms, and without other life forms humanity will perish.”
Jack Gescheidt
Link: The TreeSpirit Project
Via: VRMag
A Reason to Like Embroidery
Chicago-based illustrator Mitch O’Connell has been churning out eye-candy for years in books, comics, posters, magazine illustrations, tattoo designs and now, embroidery patterns! Sublime Stitching begged the artist to put together a sheet of his hot ‘n delinquent babes. Sure, these gals look great, but just don’t cross ‘em.
One 8 1/2 x 11″ sheet of multi-imprinting, iron-on embroidery patterns costs just $4.50. Each pack comes with complete instructions.
Link: Sublime Stitching
Nature and Technology Fusion
This lamp-cum-vase is designer Tsutomu Kurokawa’s attempt to fuse nature and technology. Made of acrylic resin, Lenorat’s outer shell holds a glass vase that can be filled with water and real flowers. Six LEDs at the base of the object illuminate both container and contents. The base is a detachable acrylic-resin component that houses the LED fitting. Three LEDs light the base and three direct beams upwards, towards vase and flowers.
Via: blueantstudio
